DDD

For years I had lower back pain.  It felt like I needed to be stretched out.  Like my spine was somehow compacted.  I have seen my fair share of chiropractors and they provided relief but nothing long term.  Then, almost five years ago I changed chiropractors and after some xrays, I was given a diagnosis I had never heard before.  Degenerative Disc Disease.  Part of me was happy to have finally found out what had been causing all my trouble but the other half of me was sad to know there isn't anything to reverse it.  I went to an orthopedic surgeon, had an MRI and he confirmed the diagnosis and gave me a better idea of what was happening to my spine.  I had moderate degeneration of the disc between my L4 and L5 vertebrae and inflammation of the vertebrae around that disc.  As a side note, my spine and tailbone are actually fused together.  Something he said is very common but to me explains why I think I don't have very good flexibility to touch my toes!  The surgeon was surprised how well I was getting along at the time due to how bad it looked but I turned down epidural injections and opted to stay with my chiropractor.  I wanted to keep from doing anything "invasive" for as long as I could. 

In 2007, I got pregnant with my son.  Life was great.  All of my back pain was gone.  I felt amazing and couldn't believe it.  But, as I have read happens, within 3 days of me giving birth, all the pain was back with a vengeance.  It was horrible.  I crawled around on the floor a lot trying to care for my son.  Anything to ease the pain in my back and legs.  I just had my second child and while I still had some pain during my pregnancy this go round, it is back full force and really affects my day.

You don't realize how much you bend over in a day until it is painful to do so.  Especially with a baby.  I am not a short person, 5' 10" tall, so there are a lot of things I do that require me to bend. 

Laying my baby down for a nap
Changing her diaper on the bed or changing table
Loading and unloading the dishwasher
Getting anything out of the lower cabinets in my house
Using my oven
Getting clothes in and out of the washer and dryer
Getting up out of a chair or sitting down in a chair
Turning my head upside down to blow dry my hair
Vacuuming
Picking up toys
Putting on my shoes, pants, etc.

And these are just a few things.  It is also quite painful to lay down and if I sit for too long, I walk like an elderly person, all bent over as if I was using a cane to walk. 

I am writing about it today because I just wish it would go away.  I wonder often what I will be like in another 10 years.  I wonder what medical treatment I will be dealing with as I age.  I wonder if all the years of competitive athletics sped up the degeneration.  It gets to me when I have to stand over my daughter's bassinet, trying to summon the strength to bend over to lay her down for bed without crying.  It gets to me when my son wants me to play and I know if I get on the floor to build those block towers, I am going to be in serious pain when I move.  It gets to me to know I am not supposed to be exercising like I do but I don't know how else to stay fit so I try and push through it. 

Oddly enough, since my diagnosis, both my brother and sister have also been diagnosed with DDD although it isn't as advanced and I hope they never have it be so.  I will continue to see the chiropractor from time to time when insurance allows and work to strengthen my abdominal muscles after having my daughter.  Both of these will help me manage some of the pain and discomfort.  Chronic pain is not a great way to spend every day of your life but I guess it is what I have been given and it could be worse.  I myself will hold out for stem cell research and hopefully one day I will be able to regenerate the bad disc.  Until then, one day at a time, one day at a time.